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Ambrose Bierce Quotes

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Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.

Amnesty, n. The state's magnanimity to those offenders whom it would be too expensive to punish.

An egotist is a person of low taste - more interested in himself than in me.

Anoint, v.: To grease a king or other great functionary already sufficiently slippery.

Apologize, v. To lay the foundation for a future offense.

Appeal in law: to put the dice into the box for another throw.

Architect. One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your money.

Ardor, n. The quality that distinguishes love without knowledge.

Bacchus, n. A convenient deity invented by the ancients as an excuse for getting drunk.

Back, n. That part of your friend which it is your privilege to contemplate in your adversity.

Backbite. To speak of a man as you find him when he can't find you.

Barometer, n. An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we are having.

Battle, n., A method of untying with the teeth a political knot that would not yield to the tongue.

Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.

Belladonna, n.: In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues.

Bigot: One who is obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you do not entertain.

Bore, n. A person who talks when you wish him to listen.

Brain, n. An apparatus with which we think what we think.

Bride, n. A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.

Cabbage, n. A familiar kitchen-garden vegetable about as large and wise as a man's head.

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