> Author Index > H - Authors > Joseph Heller Quotes

Joseph Heller Quotes





Pages: 12Next

But that was war. Just about all he could find in its favor was that it paid well and liberated children from the pernicious influence of their parents.
 

Destiny is a good thing to accept when it's going your way. When it isn't, don't call it destiny; call it injustice, treachery, or simple bad luck.
 

Every writer I know has trouble writing.
 

Frankly I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private industry.
[War]
 

He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt.
[Attempt]
 

He knew everything about literature except how to enjoy it.
 

He was a self-made man who owed his lack of success to nobody.
 

Hungry Joe collected lists of fatal diseases and arranged them in alphabetical order so that he could put his finger without delay on any one he wanted to worry about.
 

I don't believe in miracles because it's been a long time since we've had any.
 

I had examined myself pretty thoroughly and discovered that I was unfit for military service.
 

I think in every country that there is at least one executive who is scared of going crazy.
 

I want to keep my dreams, even bad ones, because without them, I might have nothing all night long.
 

I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private individuals.
 

Lots of people who complained about us receiving the MBE received theirs for heroism in the war - for killing people. We received ours for entertaining other people. I'd say we deserve ours more.
 

Peace on earth would mean the end of civilization as we know it.
 

Rise above principal and do what's right.
 

Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
 

Success and failure are both difficult to endure. Along with success come drugs, divorce, fornication, bullying, travel, meditation, medication, depression, neurosis and suicide. With failure comes failure.
[Success]
 

The enemy is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on.
 

There was only one catch and that was Catch-22, which specified the concern for one's own safety in the face of dangers that were real and immediate was the process of a rational mind.
[Wisdom]
 


Pages: 12Next