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Josh Billings Quotes


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Common sense is the knack of seeing things as they are and doing things as they ought to be done.
 

Confess your sins to the Lord and you will be forgiven; confess them to man and you will be laughed at.
 

Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there.
 

Cunning iz very apt tew outwit itself. The man who turned the boat over and got under it tew keep out ov the rain, waz one ov this kind.
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Dangers are sum like a kold bath, very dangerous while you stand stripped on the bank, but often not only harmless, but invigorating, if you pitch into them.
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Debt is a trap which man sets and baits himself, and then deliberately gets into.
[Positive]
 

Don't despise your poor relations, they may become suddenly rich one day.
 

Don't ever prophesy; for if you prophesy wrong, nobody will forget it; and if you prophesy right, nobody will remember it.
 

Don't mistake pleasures for happiness. They are a different breed of dog.
[Happiness]
 

Don't take the bull by the horns, take him by the tail; then you can let go when you want to.
 

Economy is a savings-bank, into which men drop pennies, and get dollars in return.
 

Every man has his follies - and often they are the most interesting things he has got.
[Funny]
 

Every man should kno sumthing ov law--if he knows enuff tew keep out ov it, he iz a prety good lawyer.
 

Faith is the soul riding at anchor.
 

Familiarity breeds kontempt. This only applies tew men, not tew hot bukwheat slapkakes, well buttered and sugared.
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Flattery is like cologne water, to be smelt of, not swallowed.
 

Genius ain't anything more than elegant common sense.
[Intelligence]
 

Genuine grief iz like penitence, not klamorous but subdued; sorrow from the hous tops and penitence in a market place shows more ambishun than piety.
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Giv every one you meet, my boy, the time ov day and halff the road, and if that dont make him civil dont waste enny more fragrance on the cuss.
 

Health is like money, we never have a true idea of its value until we lose it.
 


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